My family is falling apart all around me. They are having affairs, harboring hate, breaking bonds, telling lies, changing the way things have always been, and leaving altogether. I hate being in my own house because of it. I get out as often as possible, to the point that I'm getting worried about the gas in my car. This is all ruining the happiness I should be feeling at the early part of my engagement, which my parents are suddenly against as well.
I was officially announced to the youth group tonight as a student leader, and all this is on my mind. I get to announce my small group either next Wednesday or the Wednesday after that, and all this is on my mind. I have to lead whoever signs up for my group, and I don't even know where I'm going myself.
I give up God. I can't take it anymore. I can't handle any of this. I give up on my family and hand them over to you. I am going to focus on my relationship with You, my relationship with Anthony, my new role as a student leader, and definitely my studies. A new semester starts on Monday, and my family is falling apart.
I am NOT going to let this affect my relationships, my responsibilities, or my grades. Lord, I don't know what to do to take care of them anymore, and the only advice I've gotten all around is to pray, so here I am. And I am officially giving up. They're Yours, and I trust You to do with them what is in Your Will.
Help me get through all this. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm at a loss. I'm numb.